“How can I endure a lifetime of suffering if my road of life has so many obstacles,” Celeste screamed out to the wind.


Celeste became a driving force in the blowing snow to complete the shoveling of the driveway. She no longer felt the biting cold with her heated emotions keeping her warm. The only thoughts that kept coming to her mind was why were people cruel to her? “How can I endure a lifetime of suffering if my road of life has so many obstacles,” Celeste screamed out to the wind.  “I can’t keep going on, I am so tired of fighting to be free or be understood by others.  Is this my life lord?  What sins have I created to be plagued by such ugliness?”  No replies came to Celeste as she finished shoveling the driveway.  With a heavy heart the cowgirl retreats into a small shed where farm tools were stored.

She looks around the small shelter, and decides to clean the shed up just to stay away from going inside and seeing Doris.  The birthday girl was happy to find a space heater, and in no time at all the shed became cozy, and warm allowing her to stay snug as a bug in her small confinement. For several hours Celeste organized her shelter, until she came across a lovely flowered hat box tucked away from seeing eyes.  

She had seen the box before in her mother’s possession, “Mama,” Celeste whispers.  She was about to open the pretty box when she heard her father call out to her.  Softly she touches the box while thinking of her mother’s lovely face. “Celeste where are you?” she hears his calls and stays silent deep in her memories.

The door flew open and her father steps inside. “Hey girl why didn’t ya answer me, wow the shed looks great.”  Celeste didn’t look up at her father as she sat on the floor holding the treasure she found.  “That’s ya mom’s girl, what the hell are ya doing with it out here. Here give that to me, ya shouldn’t be going through her things.”  Celeste didn’t make a comment she handed the box to her father and got up off the floor. “I would like to know girl why ya so nasty to Doris?”  She didn’t give him a reply and shrugged her shoulders. “Ya have to give her a chance my little one.” Celeste couldn’t believe her father was asking her to give the wench another chance.  The anger she kept at bay began to build again inside her. She bunched up her fist really to spew her frustration out on her father when she heard a small voice inside her mind say, “Easy Hialeah.” Celeste looked around the shed wondering where the voice came from.  She looks at her father in confusion, “What’s the matter with ya girl?” Her father asked.  Celeste shook her curly hair clearing her head.  “Nothing papa,” she replies softly.

Celeste stares at the box her father held away from her.  “Time to come back in the house, I cooked us supper.”  She watches her father’s retreating form walk through the shed’s door with box in his hands. With deafen lips she shuts down the heater, and walks outside heading to the house she hated the most.

The food Celeste ate wasn’t that great, but she had to give her father credit since Doris didn’t cook at all.  After dinner she tidied the kitchen and went to her bedroom to read a western story about a boy who lost his parents.  At one point of the story she placed the book down and thought about all the times she never celebrated her birthday like the character in the story.  It seems that everyone forgot about her day except for her grandfather.  Christmas was coming up and the thought of celebrating with Doris made her want to puke. A wicked plan begins to form inside her mind when she thinks about finding deer turds to replace chocolate chips inside her cookies for Doris stocking stuffer.  She would never do something that cruel, but the thought was enticing! 


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3 thoughts on ““How can I endure a lifetime of suffering if my road of life has so many obstacles,” Celeste screamed out to the wind.

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