“Henry your too old to be dipping your pecker into a younger crowd who bleeds, try dipping ya pecker into a wine bottle.”

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Henry was madder than a hornet when he arrived at the local grocery store to buy Celeste is granddaughter her womanhood supplies. He is in the aisle for feminine hygiene and can’t decide what to buy for his little one.  Henry feels embarrass and foreign looking at all the different kinds of brands when he is knocked out of his thoughts by a friend.  “Henry your too old to be dipping your pecker into a younger crowd who bleeds, try dipping ya pecker into a wine bottle.”  Henry quickly looked up to his smiling poker player friend and turned three shades of red.  “I ain’t got no one in my life like that ya old geezer, it’s for my granddaughter.  Do you know anything about this shit?”  

Henry’s friend laughed out loud and nodded his head no, “Hang on I’ll get ya a woman over here.”  Henry’s eyes widen with fear, “No that’s okay I’ll just take these pads.”  Elderly Joe gave his friend a mischievous gaze and chuckled out loud. “Right, see ya this Thursday for a night of poker,” Joe left his friend’s side to finish his shopping with a smile upon his face for catching Henry so to say with his pants down. Henry grumbled out his dislike for being caught off guard by his friend as he headed to the check out counter with his package of pads.

Celeste let the bloody water out of the tub, and rinsed her body clean with a shower.  She took a wash cloth and folded it up to tuck in between her legs.  Naked as a jay bird and holding her cloth between her legs she went to her bedroom and took out a clean pair of underwear. With speed she put the panties on to hold the rag into place.  She grabbed a t-shirt and a pair of shorts to put on just in time before Henry returned with her girly goods.  She picked and wiggled at the discomfort of the rag between her legs.  She jumped in surprise when her granddad knocked on her bedroom door.

“Here try one of these pads between ya legs, I ain’t the best person to buy these for you darlin’ but in time you will know what’s right for ya.”  Celeste opened her door a crack to let Henry slide the package through the door.  “Thank ya kindly papa,” Celeste commented in a embarrassed tone, and began to read the instructions on the package.  By the time Celeste came out of her room she was going crazy with the thought and feeling of having something between her legs.  Henry is sitting at the large round kitchen table smoking his pipe.  She loved the scent of his tobacco compared to cigarette smoke, “Papa I…I…” Henry stopped her and said calmly to his granddaughter.  “Sit down and eat some fruit I cut up for you it will help give you some energy.”  Celeste obeyed and wiggled in her seat the discomfort of the pad.  Henry gives his granddaughter a sympathetic gaze, and plunges in with a question.

“I want to know what in the tarn nation happened girl to bring you to my home in a mess.”  Celeste knew she owed the man a response.  “Dad is gone an I didn’t want to deal with Doris.  I got scared papa I was dying, because I did something bad to Doris one day.”  Henry took a long draw on his pipe and blew out the smoke slowly, “What did you do darlin’?”  She squirmed around in her seat before answering, “I fed her cooked grasshoppers with pieces of fried frog legs.”  Henry roared out with laughter, “Sheesh, girl where is your mind wondering too.  Just because you fed Doris grasshopper’s doesn’t mean shit!  In fact that was naughty of you, but not worth you getting into trouble over.  What is happening here sweetie is you started your menstrual cycle.  All woman have this happen to them, I am not the best person to ask about this topic.  I wish your grandmother was around to give me a hand with this situation.”  Celeste nibbled on a piece of apple and didn’t realize what she said until it came out of her mouth.

“It’s my mama’s duty papa to tell me not you or grandmother.  It’s okay I prefer you talking to me about it for now.  I will try to get my self educated if ya take me to the library tomorrow.”  Celeste offered a solution peacefully.  Henry stares at his precious little granddaughter, and feels blessed in this world with a beautiful humble daughter who looks like her Cherokee grandmother except for her eyes and hair.  He shakes his head out of his thoughts of Celeste’s father’s Indian mother.  “Well eat up and I will take you back home to talk with Doris.”  Celeste’s eyes raised in wonder and yelled out, “No!”  Henry gave her an inquisitive gawk, “Out with it girl, what happened at home?”  She wiggled her rear end in discomfort and hadn’t thought of the questions he would be asking until they were set upon her to reply.  

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34 thoughts on ““Henry your too old to be dipping your pecker into a younger crowd who bleeds, try dipping ya pecker into a wine bottle.”

  1. Holy Molly ! Talk about memories. Been there, done that… Henry’s shopping.

    Never been so flabergasted in my life as looking at an entire wall of different pads… Never been so shy in my life.

    1. Wow…WHAT a COOL dad you are!!! Not many men would venture into this area! HAHA Oh…Coco we as young ladies were SHY and embarrassed just to stand at the cashiers to buy this stuff. It’s even worse when a man is standing behind you. 🙂

      1. Talk about been embarassed as you wish ! I’ve been standing at the cashiers with women standing in front and behind me ! 😯

          1. Now… Don’t try to fool me with your “purchase”. You were flirting with those dudes ! 😛

            p.s. if they didn’t “responded”, don’t fret, they probably were morons ! ROFL

          2. Dohhhh… That’s what we call a slim body… or …

            Told you ! Lost a couple of “bolts” recently. 🙂

          3. We are finally getting heat too, however a huge frost 2 weeks ago killed my garden….grrrrrr I have been horrible with ear infections and the stinking flu. WTF…its spring not winter anymore~! How have you been darlin?

          4. I don’t get ear infections and didn’t have the flu this winter. Just a SOB backpain… I killer… things are gettin’ “back” on track for now.

            I’m also quite disturbed with my garden. My rosebush is dead… I used to think of roses as “common”.. But i did learned to like them. They’re quite sensuous.

            The hybiscus is also dead. This is quite a flower too !

            But the clematis survived as the lavender and my “bean stalk”… Talk about it later.

            Hope all bad things are things of the past for you. 🙂

          5. I too had taken a hit on my Lilac’s…had to pull all up damn grubs attacked them???? Plus some trees have died too. My Hybiscus died and so did my clematis what the heck? Its hard for me to grow lavender especially when I love to bath in the wonderful scent, so I have given up on that I think they hate the desert heat! As for roses grubs destroyed them too. I think they need more care than others but I do love them and agree they are a sensuous flower~ But my favorite is the Orchid…I have a beautiful collection in my large bathroom. They love the steam and light!

          6. Orchids are for sure the loveliest flowers. Can’t grow them here… Inside the house could be possible, but i’m a jerk for inhouse growing plants. 😦

            They can “speak” all the emotions, from the most delicate and “quasi” romantic flower to pure evil. I digg! 😀

          7. I agree! Plus I adore the Vanilla flower too! I love going to Mexico when they are in full bloom, talk about intoxicating~ Hahah I don’t think ya a jerk, but I have my moments with house plants too!

          8. LOL Get this : one of my ex loved one tought i was an indoor plants torturer. So she bought me some cacti, thinking those should survive my laziness.

            They dried out ! LOL

          9. HAHA…Boy it is hard to kill a cactus…Only a sprinkle of water here and there would work? I have tons of them not in my house outside!~ To dang funny~

          10. Charlie !!! A redneck !!! 😥 Guess i’ll smash his CD…

            Now… Just to get my sight straight… Westward you then have Texas. Is Texas a redneck state ? Then comes NM. Is NM a redneck state ?

            😛

          11. Texas is a redneck state; however New Mexico is the land of Spanish, American Indian, and now Mexican’s. We don’t take to kindly having Rednecks in our state.

          12. Ahhh !!! Good thing !

            One of my “ex” was from Miami and there were some rednecks there too ! 😯

  2. Errrhhh… That being said, i would have Joe’s nose flattened for such a comment about my pecker. I understand Henry’s “non-response” by the urgent call for is spitfire girl’s distress. 😉

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